i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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