6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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