But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
my poor anus
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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