If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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