omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
