Dual....:-)
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
