you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize
