Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
