Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
