did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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