She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
