If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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