And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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