At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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