wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
