lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
