just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
