I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Houston, we have a blender
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
