there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
