even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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