so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
