Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I wear drunk well.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
