i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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