Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
