If i come over, it means nothing
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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