The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
