your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
