u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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