gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
