if i can run in heels then i can drive
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
