just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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