a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
