I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
