Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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