Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
