you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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