i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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