I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
send nudes
from the living room?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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