He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Randomize
