and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
