Can Purell be used as lube?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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