I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
