Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I will pee on everything he values.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
