The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
