You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
