it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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