i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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