i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
