My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
