wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
she peed on how many people?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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